I know all my readers are just dying to read about German-American oddities, so here it goes. These are some average American facial tissues next to their sophisticated, distant German relatives that they wished they were like. "What?", you're asking, "Fred is a tissue elitist"? Hardly. But when you have a cold, it comes in handy when your trusty tissues don't just pretend to act as a barrier between nose and hand. As is customary, this can be described in a single German key word: "durchschnupfsicher" (safe from sniffling through).
Obviously, right after the Occupy movement has successfully eradicated all social problems from modern society, we'll move on to the second biggest issue: Inferior facial tissues.